How to Eat Chips like A Spy

You know there are chips in the cupboard. Delicious chips. So crispy and flavourful. You should probably share them with the other five members of your family, but four of them are in bed and one is out for a bike ride. Wondering what to do? Wonder no more! Here’s your Guide to Eating Chips Like a Spy.

Step 1: Select your salty snack (I recommend Sour Cream and Onion, but the choice is yours). Be warned: you cannot pull off this mission with a bag of chips.

Spies only eat chips in a can. Brand of choice: Pringles.
Spies only eat chips in a can. Brand of choice: Pringles.

Step 2. Do NOT remove the safety seal. This is KEY, just peel it back far enough to fit your hand.

Seal removed = mission twarted.
Seal removed = mission thwarted.

Step 3: Eat chips. But crunch quietly. If you get a curtain call from any small children who should be in bed, deny any chip smell on your breath. Repeat after me, “Weird, I guess sometimes apples smell like chips.”

Step 4: Do not, do NOT finish all the chips. Leave some in the can. This provides you with plausibly deniability.

"Hmmm....I'm not sure who finished the can."
“Hmmm….I certainly did not finish the can.”

Step 5: Keep in mind that this technique should be used sparingly, or someone will catch on. Save it for desperate times or special celebrations, like emptying the dishwasher and finding no rejects.

What snack tricks do you have? Be honest, I know you have one.

Advertisements