What better way to celebrate a former ruler than by having a day off work and lighting fireworks all weekend? Happy Birthday, Queen Victoria, we’re just going to have some pyrotechnics in your honour. No need to feel left out there, Canada. We’ll do the same for you on the first of July. Unless you’re our teenage neighbours who randomly fire them off throughout the summer, holiday or not. It’s 1am, people with kids won’t mind – little people sleep through everything, right?
This year we thought it might be fun to do an earlier celebration with like-minded neighbours. It might still be light out, but there’s no need to keep our young children up until well past 10 to cry about the loud noise and scary popping sounds.
Can you help?
Wanted: Fireworks Lighter Must be a fast runner and calm around fire, combustible materials, and small children. Heckling is highly probable, so only applicants exhibiting superior patience levels will be considered.
A skills appraisal will be completed before hiring. This might include, but is not limited to, matches, lanterns, votive candles, and toddlers providing realistic sound effects while also shouting “it’s too loud” and then crying.
Compensation will be provided by the delight and joy given to others. And pop. Ok, pop and chips. Alright, pop and chips and other miscellaneous snack foods.
The successful candidate is responsible for providing own goggles.
Only serious applicants, please.
What’s your story? Ever been lit on fire? Had some fireworks remnants land in your eye? Yelled at teens behind your house to “keep it down! People are trying to sleep here!”
July 1 is Canada Day and I thought it would be good to test the boys on their Canadian facts.
According to the 8 year old:
Canada Day is Canada’s birthday which means it got alive that day. It’s 100 years old and before that it was a whole bunch of different cities. The boss of Canada is Prime Minister Bob Kevin (he’s very clear that Bob is his first name, Kevin is his last name). Canada is the second biggest country in the world. We speak French and English. The only difference between the US and Canada is that the US is more famous.
As most countries do, Canada has it’s share of ethnic foods, including ice cream, yogurt, lemonade, olives, pickles, and pickled corn (coincidentally, all of the 8 year old’s favourites).
Canada’s national animal is the beaver, but it is also famous for polar bears, squirrels, spiders, birds, amphibians, and reptiles. Canadian money has a beaver, a loonie, a caribou, a maple leaf, and a boat. Our money also has the Queen of England on it. The Queen is the boss of the Prime Minister, in case you were wondering how that all worked.
As far as famous Canadians go, we’ve got the Toronto Maple Leafs people*.
In Canada you can do anything, like swimming.
A little geography lesson: Ontario is a province, there are ten in total. There are three territories. Territories are cold, provinces are not.
If you’d like to double check any of these facts, click here for verification.
*The six year old chimed in that we also have Don Cherry, you know, “The hockey guy that does stuff, just talks. He’s
old and that’s it.” I was saddened that they did not know about Megan Follows or Anne of Greengables. Also disappointing was that David Suzuki was overlooked. When questioned further, eight year old said, “he’s the guy that’s on Daddy’s shirt.” (See “So, I Married David Suzuki” for more on this famous Canadian and his connection to our family.)
The four year old’s session was more question and answer.
What is Canada Day? I do not know.
What should we do on Canada Day? I do not know.
What is Canada? I do not know.
Where is Canada? I do not know.
Where do you live? With you
Where do I live? With me!
What can you find in Canada? Don’t know
Who is Don Cherry? I do not know.
Who is Megan Follows? I do not know.
What is the Littlest Hobo? I do not know already.
What’s the Canada song? Waving Flag.
Do you like Canada? NO ONE likes Canada.
Do you have any interesting Canadian trivia to share? Any questions about Canada? Ask away, we’re pretty polite.